Sardarji Jokes

By Yakacha on 12:45 PM

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OH NO!!
Sardarji finds cigarette in his daughter's room: OH NO SHE SMOKES...he exclaims


Then finds whisky bottle and again he exclaims,"OH NO SHE DRINKS"...


Can you imagine what our Sardarji finds next???

A condom!!!
Shopping in burma bazaar
One sardar came to Madras and wanted to do shopping in burma bazaar.

His tamilian friend told the Sardar that the prices will be costly and hence asked him to bargain for half the price.

Sardar went and asked the price of stereo for which the vendor told 2000 Rs. Sardar asked for Rs.1000. vendor told he can give for Rs.1800 for which sardar told no,no only Rs.900. Vendor told ok , i will give it for 1500 Rs for which sardar bargained for Rs.750.

It was going on like this when finally vendor out of irritation said he will give the Sardar the stereo free of cost. Our sardar asked whether he will give two.
Sardarji in cybercafe
Once sardarji entered a cybercafe to check his mails.It was crowded so he had to wait.As he waited he saw a man checking his mails.He stood behind him and watched.The man typed his password and was waiting when sardarji cried out "Yes yes I know your password.I can read your mails now.
"Surprised the man asked "Oh yeah, tell me what is it".
Sardarji replied " Five stars."
Fifteen inches curtain
Sardarji enters a store that sell curtains.

He tells the salesman, "I would like to buy a pair of pink curtains."

The salesman assured him that they had a large selection of pink curtains. He showed him several patterns, but Santa seemed to be having a hard time choosing.

Finally, he selects a lovely pink floral print.

The salesman asked what size curtains he needed.

Sardarji replies, "Fifteen inches."

"Fifteen inches?" asked the salesman. "That sounds very small, what room are they for?"

Sardarji tells him that they aren't for a room, they are for his computer monitor.

The surprised salesman replies, "But, sir, computers do not have curtains!"

Sardarji says, "Hellllooooooooo........I've got Windows!"
Message on the birthday cake
Banta Singh wishes to observe his wife’s birthday by holding a party. So he goes to arrange a birthday cake.

The salesman inquires him what message he prefers to* use on the cake.

Well he thinks for a while and tells: Let’s put, “you are not getting older you are getting better”.

The salesman demands, “How do you wish me to set it up ? ”

Sardar says, well put “You are not getting older”, at the top and “You are getting better” at the bottom.

The true fun didn’t kickoff until the cake was opened the entire party viewed the message decorated on the cake:

“You are not getting older at the top; you are getting better at the bottom”.
Hidden cameras
Jasmeet Kaur caught her husband Santa Singh searching high and low all around his living room. Jasmeet: "What are you searching for?" Santa: "Hidden cameras!" Jasmeet: "And what makes you think that there are hidden cameras here?" Santa: "That guy on TV knows exactly what I am doing. Why every few minutes he keeps saying, You are watching the Star World channel. How does he know that?"
Recognizing a Sardar
You should be sure the person is Sardar when he:
• puts lipstick on the forehead because he wants to make up his mind.
• gets stabbed in a shoot-out.
• sends a fax with a postage stamp on it.
• tries to drown a fish in water.
• thinks socialism means partying.
• trips over a cordless phone.
• takes a ruler to bed to see how long he slept.
• At the bottom of the application where it says “Sign Here” he puts
“Sagittarius.”.
• studies for a blood test and fails.
• sells the car for gas money.
• misses the 44 bus, and takes the 22 twice instead.
• drives to the airport and sees a sign that said, “Airport left”, he turns ground and
goes home.
• gets locked in Furniture Shop and sleeps on the floor.
Lie detector
An Englishman, an American and a Sardarji are called upon to test a lie detector . The Englishman says:
“I think I can empty 20 bottles of beer”. BUZZZZZZ, goes the lie detector.
“Ok”, he says, “10 bottles”.
And the machine is silent.
The American says: “I think I can eat 15 hamburgers”.
BUZZZZZZ, goes the lie detector.
“Allright, 8 hamburgers”.
And the machine’s silent.
The Sardarji says:
“I think…”,
BUZZZZZZ goes the machine.
Identification of Sardar
You can be sure it is a sardarji when somebody:
– Sends a fax with a stamp on it.
– Takes a ruler to bed to see how long he slept.
– Misses the 44 bus, and takes the 22 twice instead,
– Boards another bus in extreme hurry and upon seeing it is a 23C cut (\) service, promptly gets down thinking that
the bus route is cancelled.
– Takes you to the airport and saw a sign that said, “Airport left”, he turned around and went home.
– Got locked in Furniture Shop and slept on the floor.
– At the bottom of the application where it says “Sign Here” he put Sagittarius.”
– Studies for a blood test and fails.
– Spends twenty minutes looking at an orange juice box because it said “concentrate.”
– Puts lipstick on the forehead because he wanted to makeup his mind.
– Gets stabbed in a shoot-out.
Punjab Developement
Once all Sardarji’s clubed together and decided to develop Punjab and they
wanted the Punjab as a Developed State.
Each of them started giving suggestions … finally one great Sardarji gave
a suggestion with a huge volume “Lets fight with Indian Government, get
freedom from India then, Declare war on America…. We will be definitely
defeated by America and we shall be the part of the America and then they
will obviously develop our punjab also”….
“Wow” the crowd cheered up….. there was at last a thin voice asking ……..

“What about if we win ?”
Sardar And Indian Flag
Santa singh goes to a shop to buy Indian flag.
The shopkeeper gives him a Indian flag.
Santa singh looks at it for a while and says something.
What does he say?
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-
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Do you have anyother color in this ???
Sardar's Son at Medical School
Bantasingh : I am so proud of my son. He is at medical school.
Santasingh : Whatt is he studying ?
Banta : Oh he is not studying. They r studying him !
Sardar's Weight Loss
The doctor told Sardarji that if he ran eight kilometers a day for 300 days, he would
lose 34 kilos. At the end of 300 days, Sardarji called the doctor to report he had lost the weight,
but he had a problem.
"What's the problem?" asked the doctor.

I'm 2400 kms from home.

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